With going to counseling twice a month, I have been learning a lot about my condition. I have learned why I fidget with things when in public, I have learned that my weight is a part of my anxiety and the two go hand in hand. I have discovered I do certain things, I didn’t realize I did.
I think once I get my weight under control, the anxiety will also fall into place, I never really realized how bad things were until I started talking to someone about my problems. As we talk in our meeting, and my counselor is talking about different signs and symptoms of my condition, I am sitting their nodding my head, because that is so me.
It all has to do with being judged and not wanting to look like a fool. I often stumble over my words, and would rather not be around large groups of people, because I feel like I will be out of place… Would I be out of place probably not, but in my mind I would be and this triggers my anxiety. I often don’t leave the house unless my husband or daughter is with me, and when I am out by myself, I keep myself distracted.
I am hoping with counseling, it will help me better understand myself, and I will drop some weight and have more confidence in myself. Years of being put down by my father has lead me to the problems I have today, now it’s time I get my problems fixed so that I can have a productive life!